Well I hit rock bottom at 2am this morning. I couldn't sleep and I had a total meltdown. I was so close to just walking out and just walking to nowhere in particular. I felt as if the world was on my shoulders. I wrote a mega huge letter to Pete telling him I couldn't cope anymore with everything. Its not only Jordy its the new job, its christmas, its everything. I told Pete that i couldn't cope with him not talking to me about everything and how we don't do things as a couple anymore. I suggested us getting a movie out the other night and he said that he didnt want to as he couldnt be bothered. So we sat in the lounge with him watching soccer. I know he copes in his own way but we still need to be a couple.
I ended up falling asleep about 6am on the couch.I left the letter on the table for him. I woke up to him cleaning up and I was sort of scared of how he was going to react to the letter...the daft twit hadn't even seen it. So i ripped it up before he could. We did however have a huge talk and seemed to have settled a lot between us.
The girls stayed at my nannas last night so we only had Jordy. We took Jordy and Murphy (dog) down to the beach today and had a nice afternoon just talking.
Needless to say i feel like a pile of crap today but am making a effort to cook tea soon. Chicken stuffed with capsicum and bacon with a huge salad and strawberries and icecream for dessert.